He's OURS!!!!!!

He is mine in a way he will never be hers, yet he is hers in a way he will never be mine.  And so together, we are motherhood.

 

Our Baby Boy is HOME!!!!

We are pleased to share with you our son

 

Kyson Allen Fought

Born May 12, 2014

Forever ours May 15, 2014

7 lbs 12 oz

20 1/2 inches

8:01am

 

To the woman to who gave us the greatest gift of all:
    You didn't have to be strong and find him another home.  You didn't have to seek out someone for him to call "mom and dad".  To be honest, you didn't have to have him at all.  But you did.  It is because you did that we hold the most precious and perfect being!  It is because of you that Greg will get to celebrate his first father's day.  It is because of you that Bob and Beth have their 1st grandchild and it is because of you that my mom and Rick have another grandchild!
   It occurred to me that during one of the most trying times in your life you had the ability to think of Kyson rather than yourself.  You fought to insure he'd be loved and cared for and to me that showed the epitome of strength.
   We want you to know that he is loved beyond anything imaginable. 
   If you are ever down, we need you to know that you made a beautifully selfless decision. We want you to know that Kyson will never grow up not knowing he once came from somewhere else but he had a mom that loved him enough to let him go. 
  We promise to take care of the little boy you trusted us to love.  We could never repay you, but we need to thank you.  You are our hero.
Love you more than you know,
Greg and Jami



I have followers!

FAITH.....it does not make things easy, it makes things possible!

 

 

Let me just start out by saying I'm impressed I actually have people that follow my blog!  (Besides the people that HAVE to...Greg, Tre', Ashlin, my mom....).  I started writing this blog as kind of a "therapy" for myself, to get things out and off my chest and to have our journey documented.  I never imagined I would have so many people that cared about our journey enough to follow my blog and try to read what I write...even though it doesn't make sense half the time!  In the last 2 days, 5 different people have asked me why I haven't updated my blog!  So, thank you for following it and I am sorry I haven't updated in almost a month!  (I will try to do better!)

 

With that being said, no news is good news, right!?

 

As my friend Maridee said today, "Can you believe in the next 7 days you will have gone to Disney World and possibly have a baby?"  Yep, that is how we operate!  If you remember, in January, we planned a trip to Disney World to vacation with the kids on May 8-11.  We are still planning on going on vacation and leaving on Thursday.  We will fly down to Florida early Thursday morning and we get back about supper time on Sunday!  We are so excited to spend time with Tre' and Taylen can't wait to see him as they haven't seen each other since Tre' left in January.

 

This adoption is significantly different than the previous.  There is very little communication and the birth mom's mom (let's call her grandma) is really pushing for this adoption.  Up until this week, I really haven't let myself think much about it....which could explain the lack of blog post!  Now that we are 7 days from birth and we are going to be gone 4 of those days, I am starting to think of all these questions and needing to have some sort of plan. 

 

Monday, May 12th, is baby day!  She is scheduled for a c-section that day.  With that being said, we are unsure when we will get to meet the baby.  Nebraska laws don't allow her to sign her rights away anytime before 48 hours.  With it being a c-section, it may be longer.  Also under Nebraska law, the birth mom can't be on any pain medications when she signs.  So, we may know more Wednesday or Thursday of next week.

 

Now, my feelings are this.....I don't have great feelings about it!  "Grandma" is very much "for" this adoption and so I am not sure if this is birth mom's idea or "Grandmas".  Only time will tell, I guess.  Again, Maridee says I need a better, more positive attitude....she may be right! :-)

 

So, we are off to Disney and hopefully off to the hospital all within the next 7 days!  Stay tuned....



And we are back...

The hardest thing about "everything happens for a reason" is waiting for the reason to come along

First of all let me make this disclaimer:  You should never write a blog post when you are not in a good head space!  I have just re-read my last blog post and I am apologizing!  The grammar is terrible and it really doesn't even make sense!  Thank you all who didn't point that out.....and thank you all who understood what I was trying to say! 

It has now been 10 days since we said good-bye to a baby we never met.  Aysoni did text me and was very apologetic.  She also told me she named him Dylan and he weighed 7lbs 8oz.  We just pray they are all doing well.

Greg returned from Florida on March 29th and I returned April 1st.  We made the best of a bad situation and, of course, visited Tre' and went to Disney World.  It was awesome getting through the entire park in 2 hours!  The perks of having our own personal tour guide!  My feet hurt so bad!  We had a wonderful time and I had such a relaxing time hanging out with him for the next few days after Greg left.  My sister came to Orlando and us three sat by the pool and talked and laughed!  Just what the Dr. ordered!!!

Back on the adoption note, we are still on track with the May baby.  Nothing new has happened with that, but I have talked with the birth mom and she is doing well and still wanting to go through with everything! But, we all know not to get our hopes up.  The birth mom works for a CPA and is extremely busy until April 15th!  She did tell me that the birth father would like to meet us...and we are excited for that!  She seems very smart and words everything very well! I'm very impressed with her.  I am letting her contact me when she wants.  She is anxious to find out the gender...not for her sake, but for ours.  We would love to know the gender, but if we find out on May 12th, that is fine also!  We returned all the clothes for several reasons.  So, when and if the time comes that we are to be parents to another child, we will re-buy everything!   

Until then, we will continue with work, kids' activities and planning another trip to Disney!  We are super excited and ready to close one chapter and start another!

We are getting good at this!

                                   If plan A or B didn't work....there are 24 more letters left!

Well, I wish I had good news to share. 

I made it to Tampa on Tuesday night, Greg made it Wednesday at around lunch time.  

Aysoni went to the hospital Wednesday morning at 5 am and told me should would let me know when she's as checked in and ready. I knew then things weren't going to go well! Greg and I sat down for lunch and got a call from Tammy.  Aysoni was having second thoughts and she wasn't sure what she was going to do! My heart sunk! We made a decision then that we would not see the baby until she decided and signed the papers.  We knew it could be 48 hours.  We decided to stick around Tampa...just because it was 2:00 and we were tired and didn't want to fight traffic getting to Orlando about rush hour.  We got an email about 4:00 and it had said baby was born. Again, our hearts sank.  We were across the street from what could be our baby and we could do nothing. Shortly thereafter, we got a call from Tammy and she had stated that Aysoni told her she thought she was going to be able to do it, but she just couldn't.  So, right there in the restaurant we were at I started crying and basically didn't stop all night. 

We went to our room and mourned. We talked, laughed and cried. We ordered room service, Greg got into a robe (hopefully he did that to try to make me laugh) and we just ate pizza and talked. I did hear from Aysoni later that evening and she apologized and said she was sad. I told her that we were also sad, but we could never understand the enormity of her decision. I told her that like I have said all along, I wanted her to do what was best for her and her family and this is what she thinks is best.  I told her I would pray for peace for her and wanted her to enjoy her new family. She didn't give me details on the baby, but I did tell her to kiss him for us!

Again this morning, she text me that she was so sorry and sad.  I again told her I wanted her to be at peace with her decision and we were not upset with her at all.  

Like I told Greg...she doesn't have the support she needs for such a major decision. Everyone around her wanted her to keep the baby for one reason or another.  I compared it to a time when we went to Blizzard Beach as a staff ( a Disney water park) and I didn't want to go down this steep slide. I kept telling myself I would all the way up and then when we got to the top, if Greg and Maridee would not have been there basically making me....I would have turned around and went back down the steps! (I know, terrible comparison, but you get it, right?)

Anyway, the highlight of the trip is that we got to see Tre'.  It was so great to see him and to be able to spend the next 5 days with him just where we need to be....The Happiest Place on Earth.

One Week!

Life is like a camera....FOCUS on what's important, CAPTURE the good times, DEVELOP from the negatives, and if things don't work out TAKE ANOTHER SHOT!

Life has been pretty uneventful these last few weeks.  

Aysoni is still not communicating as much as she was in the beginning, but everything is still going as planned.  So we will see how this all turns out!

She did tell me that they have scheduled an induction date for her because they think the baby is getting too big.  She is scheduled to be induced March 26, 2014.  ONE.  WEEK.  AWAY.

I have A LOT of anxiety now, for several reasons!  The first is obvious!  Second, this date is also Tre's birthday and the fact that we will be 45 minutes away from him on his birthday and possibly not get to see him is killing me!  This will be the first time in 19 years I haven't spent a birthday with him!  Secondly, we will be leaving Taylen behind and the thought of not seeing him for possibly 2 weeks is killing me!  Thirdly, the thought of staying in a hotel for 2 weeks with a newborn baby in a forgien town is cause enough for anxiety!

We have purchased our airline tickets already.  I will be leaving March 25th and Greg will follow on the morning of the 26th.   We fly in and out of Orlando so we will need to get rental cars and drive to Tampa. (Which reminds me, I need to do that!) Greg will be coming home on the 29th so he can start back to work on the 31st.  I have a tentative return date of April 1st.  IF this doesn't work out, Greg and I will spend time with Tre' and some time to relax after these month of stress!  IF it does work out, I will probably not be able to come home until at least April 10th, so I will just extend my ticket!  I will be staying in a Disney Resort, so it can't be all that bad!

I have gone through the suite case multiple times just to make sure we have everything we may need.  We aren't taking a car seat/stroller down there, because how devastating would it be to have to bring it home empty?!  So, we will buy those things when we get down there! Taylen and I did put together our Mama-Roo (an AWESOME gift from our friends Brad and Heather) just to make it seem like SOMETHING was ready!  

If this baby is born on March 26th, she can't sign her rights over until she is medically discharged OR 48 hrs...whichever comes first.  So, by March 28th, we should know if the baby is ours or not!  Please pray for a good outcome for everyone!!!

The next time I blog will be the big day......

Two are better than one, right?

Sometimes miracles come in pairs.

Excuse me while I have a tiny panic attack!

Now that I think about it....I think we were always meant to have two babies!  

When we were chosen this time around, we always knew there was a chance we could still get little Oscar.  We always had in the back of our minds that we could end up with "twins" that were 6 weeks apart.  We never imagined it may come true.  Now, just to be clear, Oscar is doing well, so we hear....and unfortunately, he will not be coming to live with us!

Let's start with Aysoni.  Things have kind of taken a little turn...we aren't sure what kind of turn, but we know things have turned.  Remember she was always so good at communication...up to a constant 9 hours a day??  Well, on Thursday, I got a call from the social worker in Florida (Emily).  Of course, my heart always drops when my phone rings.  Anyway, she just wanted to tell me she was pregnant (which I knew) and she was having some health problems and needed to quit work.  I was very sorry to see her leave because she is very nice and good with dealing with Aysoni, but deep down I was relieved that is all the phone call was about!  Then my phone rang about an hour later and it was Emily again.  I figured she forgot to tell me something!  Nope....she had talked to Aysoni and now Aysoni's grandmother AND aunt want her to keep the baby.  She lives with both of them and they help her A LOT with her other children and she feels like the only reason they want her to keep the baby is for "more benefits" to them! Example:  Food stamps, tax write off, welfare....etc!!  It is very sad and Aysoni knows it is wrong of them to want this baby as a "meal ticket".  She said she is still adamant about the adoption and wanting us to have the baby, but she has since cut her communication drastically.  This worries us terribly!  She is stuck between not wanting to disappoint her family and knowing what is the best thing to do for her and her baby!  Only time will tell and we pray this opportunity works out!  Aysoni wants to get out of the "mess" she is in and wants to better herself and she knows keeping this baby is not the right thing to do.  Please keep praying for her!

Now, here is the rest of the story:  long story short....Greg's mom knew somebody who had a granddaughter who needs to find a home for her unborn baby.  She asked us if we were interested in getting more information and of course we said yes!  JUST IN CASE THINGS DON'T WORK OUT WITH AYSONI!  Anyway, Beth (Greg's mom) gave her friend our phone number and they called us on Sunday and wanted to interview us.  We met with her and she was interviewing potential birth parents for her baby that is scheduled to be born May 12, 2014.  We explained to her our situation and that we would be interested IF our current opportunity doesn't work out.  We told her we would know more in 3 weeks and if she could wait that long we would love it, but completely understand if she can't.  She lives here in Lincoln, she goes to my OBGYN and would like us, if chosen to go to all Dr. appts. with her.  Now, this sounds like the perfect opportunity!  After she left, we both looked at each other and realized we might have just made a terrible mistake!  It wasn't fair for us to ask her to wait for us and it wasn't fair for the other potential candidates either.  So, we called her back and told her we would be interested regardless of how our other situation turns out.  Worse case scenario....we have "twins" who are 6 weeks apart!  There are worse things in life that could happen!  

Well, we got the call tonight that we have been chosen by the Lincoln birth mom!  We are not sure the sex of this baby, she doesn't even know.  We can find out at one of her doctor's appts.  We are a little panicked right now....we could now have to be preparing for two babies!  More than that though, we are feeling beyond blessed.  We will figure it out! 

We are so excited that we have these great opportunities!  We will know more in three weeks or so when Aysoni has the little man and she does or doesn't sign her rights away!  We are so excited about everything and ask for your prayers and positive thoughts as we continue on this amazing roller coaster we are on!

So in conclusion....if no one has summer plans....please feel free to come visit and keep us sane!!! :-)

No News is Good News

You can't control everything.  Sometimes you just need to relax and have faith that things will work out.  Let go and let life happen.

I know it has been a while since I updated.  That is a good thing, I guess.  

Everything is going along just fine.....same 'ole, same 'ole!  

The only big thing that has happened with the adoption in the last week is the birth father has officially signed his rights away.  That really means nothing other than we don't have to worry about him IF she goes through with the adoption.  That is a step in the right direction as the birth father was the reason we ended the other adoption opportunity.  So, that makes us feel a little better.  Now, we just have to make sure mom wants to sign away her rights.  She can do that after 48 hours or after she is medically discharged. 

Aysoni still continues to have EXCELLENT communication.  I have spoken to the agency about her constant communication and hopefully they will talk to her about it.  My concern is that once this is all over, she will not only lose a baby, but a "best friend" as she calls me.  I appreciate and understand her wanting to talk to me a lot....I mean, she is giving us her baby...and I am sure she wants to feel like she is giving him to "friends" versus "strangers".  So, I will continue to constantly communicate with her, if that is what she wants.  I have never been in her position, but I can say that if I was in her position, I would want to make sure my baby was going to "friends".

Taylen has finished up wrestling for this season and had a great time.  He went 10-14...which was darn good considering this was his first year wrestling and most of his opponents have been wrestling since the age of 4. We are trying to talk him into trying out for baseball....hopefully he gets bored quick with not doing anything after school and tries out!  But, as with the wrestling kids, he has been doing baseball since he was 4...my guess he is burnt out!

Taylen and his buddy after the last wrestling meet

Tre' is still loving Disney.  We are hoping this baby will work out and I will get to spend a couple weeks with him in March/April.  And we are still planning a vacation to see him in May!

Tre' with his buddy, Donald Duck

And, if any one is wondering about my namesake fish....well, he died!