Adoption isn't a birth mother's rejection, but an unconditional love that inspires her to put herself last
Merry almost Christmas! I still cannot believe Christmas is in 5 days! I do believe our shopping is all done, our baking is close to being done, and our house is not at all clean!
This week was a big week for me...I had a feeling that I NEED to be in control of something on this journey! Sarah and I have been texting about every other day. I am a texter, she is not. I would prefer to text over talk! I just don't have time to sit and talk on the phone...she does! So, I had a plan- What if we set a time, once a week, to talk on the phone! So, we decided I would call her on Friday's at 6:00pm. If we wanted to text/talk throughout the week, we could, but this could be our set time! I know she has doctor's appointments on Tuesday's and Friday's, so this could be our time to catch up. Tonight was our first "call".
I called her at around 6:00 pm and we talked for about 1 hour and 15 minutes! It was lovely. There were some moments that absolutely took my breath away. She did tell me that her appointment today went very well. It was an ultrasound and she said everything looked great!
She then asked me if we were ready for the baby. I asked her what she meant by that...like do we have a car seat, or are we mentally ready for a newborn in our home? Yes and Yes! She wanted to know if we had names picked out and the answer to that is, No, we do not! I told her I would love her suggestions! We are having a hard time agreeing on a name! I asked her if she was ready and how she was doing with all of this. She said "I'm not going to lie, I think about this everyday!" She thinks about if this is the right decision. She thinks about what she wants to do with her life and that a newborn would probably set her back. She thinks about the people that she says judge her for giving this baby up for adoption. She said in the area she lives, people think she is taking the "easy way out" and not facing her problems head on. I gave her my two cents....those people have clearly never had to make this heart wrenching decision that she is making. We talked about the hospital where she is going to deliver and how she is excited for three meals a day! (Broke my heart!) We talked about a great cupcake place in Cincinnati that I am now excited to try! We talked about her children and school and laughed a lot!
She said a couple things to me that stopped me in my tracks and made me realize the magnitude of this decision! She told me that the only reason she didn't have an abortion was because she couldn't afford it! I feel like something/someone intervened and knew that this baby would be saved by us! I feel like we are being put through this process so quickly to give this baby a chance! I don't know if it will actually be us physically giving this baby a chance, but I do know we played a part in knowing this baby gets to have a life now! We talked about the future and if we get the privilege of raising this baby, how she will forever be part of our family. She had mentioned one time that she would not like the baby to know she is his "mom". I told her we would respect her wishes, but I hope she reconsiders. We want this baby to know that he had a mom that loved him so much that she chose life for him and chose to give him a life that she could not!
As hard as this journey has been for us, it is just a tiny bit of what she is feeling. I'm glad we are going through this, I am learning so much about myself! And Greg still couldn't believe we talked for that long!
So, in conclusion....if you have any two or more syllable names that you like....we are taking suggestions!
Merry Christmas!!!!
