Everything happens for a reason...

If Plan "A" didn't work....the alphabet has 25 more letters!

Let me start out by saying.....this has been quite a week! Actually, quite the 10 days! Whew!

As you remember, we made the decision to not proceed with the adoption in Ohio.  As soon as the dust settled from that and all the phone calls were made, Greg and I had a chance to mourn a child we never knew.  Mourn the what ifs and what could have beens.  We took a day to ourselves and just mourned.  That  is what we needed.  It is amazing how broken our hearts were and still are for a baby we never knew.  We want only the best for the baby in Ohio (PS...we were going to name him Oscar).  I do still keep in contact with Sarah.  She is still pregnant and she is doing as best as can be expected.  I do send her little text every now and then just to help her keep her spirits up and she text me every once in a while, also.  I still want to help her if I can. 

Adoption is such a roller coaster ride...and not a fun one!  

Of course, we have been in the process of planning a trip to see Tre'.  On Tuesday (1/28) I was on the internet looking for airline tickets and my phone rang.  It was our client liaison from the agency, Carol.  She calls every once in a while to check in on us and see how things are going.  Well, I was getting a good deal on the plane tickets and didn't want to lose them, so I asked her right away if I could call her back!  I hung up with her and my computer froze...!  So I called Carol back.  Much to my surprise, she had ANOTHER adoption opportunity for us!  She was just "checking" to see if we were ready and were willing to take a call from an Adoption Advisor.  I took down the bare minimum information and told her I would call her back.  I needed to talk to Greg!  Both Greg and I were a little hesitate to tell her we would take the call....it was the reality that we were really NOT getting little Oscar.  And we were sad.  But, we decided we would like to hear the details of this other opportunity.  I truly believe things happen for a reason, so let's see!

We took the call on 1/28/14 at 7:00 pm.  We have a new Adoption Advisor, her name is Tammy.  She had  a 24 year old African American mom who chose us.  She is due March 31, 2014.  She is from Tampa, FL and the birth dad is willing to sign his rights away as soon as we accept.  With the laws in Florida, he can.  We listened and took notes and asked MANY questions and asked her if we could call her the next day.  We talked to each other and talked to the kids, googled Florida's laws, talked to people we didn't even know, called the pediatrician, called my OBGYN and then called the agency and said YES!!!!  We haven't quite got to the "excited" part yet.  We are very cautious this time around.  We are still very nervous!  I even spent my lunch hour returning clothes we had already bought.  This new baby is a boy, so we had clothes, but I didn't want to HAVE any here. (Plus, they would have been out of season!)  

We "met" our birth mother today and she is so much different than Sarah.  Sarah was so quiet and reserved and Aysoni is NOT!  I like Aysoni so much.  She has two other children - a 5 year old and 2 year old.  She told us she has been reading a book to her 5 year old about his little brother's "new family".  The little kids are ADORABLE and the 5 year old has already asked us to come over and spend the night.  He already told his mom "I love my little brother's new family".  Melted my heart!

We think, if everything works out, that this is going to be a wonderful opportunity.  I would still have to stay in Florida for a couple weeks after the birth, just like Cincinnati, but I can handle Florida for that long!  :-)  We are so lucky that we will be able to move anywhere in the state during that couple of weeks IF this opportunity goes through, so we will move from Tampa to Orlando during that time, probably.  Tre' is there, my sister is there and Greg's cousins are close by.  I also have a friend there.  So those two weeks should fly by until we can all be back in Lincoln together! So, this just seems like a better opportunity!

That is enough information for now!  We would love to ask for prayers or positive vibes for us for this new journey, for Sarah as she faces the unknown, for little Oscar that he knows how much we love him, for Aysoni and her boys (including the new one) to make these next 8 weeks run smoothly.  

And..for those wondering....I never did get the plane tickets for our Disney trip!  Coincidence???

A decision was made

A bend in the road is not the end of the road...unless you fail to make the turn

Today was "D" day.  Greg and I decided we would think about things and make a decision by Wednesday....well, today is Wednesday!

We have talked to countless people over the last 5 days...attorneys in both Nebraska and Ohio, the adoption agency and the social workers.  We wanted to have all of our options laid out in front of us before we made this decision.

Basically, to make a long story short, in Ohio, IF the birth dad comes forward before the baby is born, then the birth mom and dad both have to agree on the adoption.  He was not on board.  And, in Ohio, no matter what kind of "father" he is, he has 30 days to contest the adoption and he would probably win.  We were in no way going to have to take a baby home just to have to give him back to him.  If Greg and I were the only ones in this equation, we may have thought a little differently.  We could have given this baby 30 days of love (may be the only unconditional love he ever feels), but we have two other kids, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and countless friends who would also be attached to him.  We did not want to risk that.  We know all adoptions are risky, but in Ohio, and with their laws, this one just became High Risk!  So, after much thought, we have decided to walk away from this opportunity.  Now, the only one who loses here is the baby.  And that is what saddens us the most - what could have been for this baby!  We know another opportunity will come our way.  When?  We are not sure, that is out of our hands.

The win-win of this situation is this:  We are officially back on the waiting list as of late today (so begins the obsession again of "how many people don't like us") AND, if this jerk decides to do the right thing and sign his rights away, we will get called to come get this little guy, but while we are waiting for him to be born and to find this out, we are also not missing any other opportunities that may come our way.  

I truly believe everything happens for a reason.  There is a reason we are supposed to be going through this right now....not sure the reason, but I am sure I will figure it out someday!  And, we feel that we will someday make awesome parents to some little girl/boy that is waiting for us!

2013 was beyond perfect for us, so a little bump in the road is not going to stop us!

A decision may have to be made

Be grateful for all the obstacles in your life.  They have strengthened you as you continue your journey.

Wow!  Where do I start this week! This is the first week that has flown by in quite awhile!  I can't even tell you what day it is!

I started out this week in sunny Florida dropping Tre' off to be Mickey's assistant!  Saying goodbye to my oldest son and leaving him in Florida was the hardest thing I have ever done.  Now, don't get me wrong, I know he is going to have the time of his life and this experience is going to be fantastic, but selfishly, I hated leaving him!  I returned to Lincoln on Tuesday afternoon, had my braces adjusted and went on to work.  I did, however, come home to a clean house!  That Greg, he sure is pretty great!

On Wednesday, I received a message from the agency, asking if I could call them back.  I missed the called and the message came in late in the day and Mary explained that she was leaving for the day and to call her in the morning!  So I did.  Little did I know this would start a whole weekend full of stress. 

You have to remember that there are four people that have to be in contact and it gets a little confusing who talked to whom and what was said.  There is us, Mary from the agency in California, Jenni - the social worker from Ohio and Sarah. 

Apparently, the birth dad has now come forward!  He has been aware of the adoption and has had no contact with Sarah up until now.  We do not know his motives....does he just want to be part of the adoption plan?  Does he want custody of the baby?  Does he have family members who want the baby?  Does he want Sarah to keep the baby and he will "help" her?  Is he just being a jerk and want to cause drama?  

I have talked to both Mary and Jenni a few times in the last twenty-four hours.  Nobody really knows what his motive is until they can get a hold of him.  Mary just called me tonight and said she has been texting him and he is willing to talk to her on Monday or Tuesday of next week.  Now, we are 17 days away from the due date, so time is of the essence.  

There are a few different things that can happen right now.  1) nothing will come of this and we continue as planned; 2) birth dad talks Sarah into keeping the baby 3) birth dad decides to fight for the baby and it ends up in a fight between us and him.

Greg and I may have a decision to make.  IF Sarah goes ahead and signs her rights away, but he decides to fight for the baby and wins, we would have to give the baby back to him.  That is not what we want to have to do at all.  We would rather not meet this baby then love him for 1 minute and have to give him back. 

As of right now, we have been told to be "concerned", but not "alarmed".  Which, in my mind, means "stress out completely".  We know there is a plan for us and for a baby.  Will is be this little guy? Who knows!  But we do know we are meant to be parents to three kids!  So, we ask for positive vibes and prayers!  We ask for good thoughts and prayers for Sarah to help her be strong these last few days!  

Weeks are flying by!

                     Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting, so....get on your way!

This will be a super quick post for two reason....1) I'm waiting to board a plane and 2) I'm on my iPad!

I haven't had a lot of time to blog this week as I have been getting everything prepared for Tre's departure to Florida! We are currently waiting to board our flight so he can spread his wings at Disney!!! We are so excited for him to be interning there for the next 5-8 months, but also, I am a little sad! (For selfish reasons.... I'll miss that little sass!)

I know, it is kind of risky that I chose to take a trip to Florida 3 weeks before the baby is due, but, hey, either way we are a plane ride away! I have everything together for the baby "just in case" for Greg to grab and go! Although he will need to locate a suitcase as Tre' and I have them all!

I talked to Sarah on Friday and all is going well, so far. We talked about her plan once she gets to the hospital and how she is getting there.  She doesn't want any friends/family with her, so she told me she will have to take a cab or ambulance! I am hoping we can scheduler he baby's arrival so maybe wea I'll be able to take her!

Greg and I did decide that if the baby wasn't born by the 25-26 I would probably just go out there and wait....and hope it isn't too long! We are still cautiously excited!

This week has been crazy! Taylen got home from London as scheduled, the polar vortex was a monster and Tre' came down with the flu! Never a dull moment at our house!

We have to board now....out of the cold and into the sun!

Happy New Year

There are times when the adoption process is exhausting and painful and makes us want to scream.  But then I remember...so does childbirth!"

     Happy 2014!  I can't believe this is the year that we will welcome a little baby into our home and hearts! Hopefully! 

     We are exactly 4 weeks from the due date and the freaking out has already began!  I was getting things together to pack "just in case" when I realized...we needed more!  We had 6 outfits and no place for the baby to sleep....upstairs!  We have purchased a pack-n-play for downstairs, but we have nothing for upstairs!  Once again, thank goodness for friends!  I was telling Maridee this and like magic, she loaded up Greg's truck with items we "needed"!  Greg was shocked at all of this!  Load of laundry done, packed and bassinet set up! I feel a little better!  Blankets...we need blankets!  I have that on the list!  And of course, when I buy one child something I feel I have to buy them all three something!  This could get expensive!

   To end 2013, Tre' and my niece had their wisdom teeth pulled and Taylen went to London!  Taylen got the better end of that deal!  It was so fun to see Taylen on TV performing in the Queen's Parade on New Year's Eve and even more entertaining to see Tre' and Ashlin after their procedure!  My mom and Rick were here for Christmas and took care of them (and us) while Greg and I worked!  We all had so much fun and always sad to see them go!  But, as of today, Taylen is on his way home and Tre' and Ashlin are good as new....just minus some wisdom!

My mom and Rick with the patients

Tracking Taylen's flight home!

I spoke with Sarah last night for our weekly call.  Not too much news to update.  She had her ultrasound and she said "he still has all fingers and toes"!  That's good to know!  She always has some sort of drama going on....this week it was her cable!  So I talk about that with her and bring up the baby when I can.  But mostly we talked about cable and bills!  I guess that is what I am here for!  I explained to her that I was leaving to take Tre' to Florida next Sunday, so I would appreciate her holding that baby in until I get back ! :-)

I have a feeling the baby will be born either January 18 or February 9.  I am not sure why I think that, but I do!  And I feel like he's going to weigh about 9 lbs!  Not sure why I feel that either!  I asked Greg if he had any thoughts....he doesn't!  What about you?

And, speaking of Maridee...she figured out that ultrasound view!  (What would I do without her???)  It is his little butt (looking up).  You can see his little hiney, his legs and his "boy parts" and the umbilical cord! If you look really close to the top of the ultrasound, it says "I'm a boy"!  So, it is verified!

That is all the updates I have for now!  I guess no big updates are good, right?